How to guide our kids towards happiness

Christine L’Abbé

I recently picked up The Law of Attraction by Esther and Jerry Hicks, an audio book I had listened to many years ago, but felt inclined to revisit.

For those who don't know, there are three universal laws that govern the universe: the law of attraction, the law of deliberate creation and the law of allowing. To master the art of becoming the creator of our own reality is to become familiar with these laws and how to work with them. This starts with a deep understanding and sense of self, on all planes: the physical, the emotional, the mental and the spiritual. This is followed by an understanding and sense of what we want and don't want, like and don't like, and what feels in alignment with our inner being. This comes with life experience, exploration, and freedom to be who we are.

After years of being committed to my own growth and expansion, alongside curiously exploring the most aligned ways to support my children and the children I serve, it occurred to me that I was only now truly beginning to understand how to master these laws. It's one thing to understand something in the mind, but without being attuned to what is felt in the physical body, having the ability to sit with and feel our emotions, or become quiet enough to identify the difference between our inner voice and the voice of our conditioning, it is very difficult to successfully attract into our lives those things that are most in alignment with our soul's intention. 

Many of us grew up in a world where we were told what to want and not want, what was most desirable and what was not, what was deemed a successful life and what was not, what we should prioritize and what we should not. We were led to value those things that are most valued by society, led to lose our sense of self and individuality early on to fit into a mold. This led to a disconnection from our inner guidance system.

The lack of opportunity to explore what lights us up or to be told that what lights us up has no value, led us to get really confused about what was meant for us, and created a sense of misalignment within us, leading us to make decisions and create a life that wasn't necessarily aligned with what would bring us happiness. Happiness being a result of our ability to follow our bliss.

Now let's think for a minute how this affects our parenting. If we were never given a chance to explore and discover our own innate potential, those things that bring us the deepest sense of joy, then how can we possibly guide a child, let alone a neurodiverse or a divergent child to thrive in happiness?

It is in our uniqueness that we find those things that we are most good at.

It is in the freedom to explore that we uncover those things that feel good to us.

It is in learning about our inner guidance system and becoming empowered to use it that we are led towards that which is most in alignment with our inner being, our soul.

What is it that you want most for your child? Most parents will answer: happiness. However, these same parents may choose to control how their child is to achieve that happiness forgetting that happiness comes from following our individual path to inner bliss. Bliss being a reflection of our ability to create, express and expand in ways that are unique to us.

How can one person know what is best for another? Each and every one of us is individual, diverse, one of a kind. None of us can carve another's path, or protect them from pain. We can, however, empower a child to learn to hear, feel and understand their own inner guidance system and create a safe space for them to uncover those things that light them up. We can only do this once we've learned to hear, feel, and understand our own inner guidance system, and when we've allowed ourselves to explore those things that bring us joy. It is in the depth of our connection to ourselves that we become deeply connected and attuned to our child's inner guidance system. As we understand the importance of following it's guidance, we begin to allow our children to simply be who they are and, rather than try to mold them, create a safe container for them to express themselves freely in a world of possibilities, not to lose themselves to limiting beliefs, conditioning and social culture.

When we begin to greatly appreciate all those parts of us that make us the unique individual being that we are, we feel joy, and we feel empowered to create and contribute to life.

To support our children is to co-create with them.

It is to empower them to discover their unique amazingness by creating an environment in which there is freedom to be explore what is in alignment and what is not. It is to remind them of the importance of nourishing their inner world so that they may be guided by their own innate intelligence. Teaching them to listen to their joy. Empowering them to know themselves, rather than imposing on them a way of being.

Now the question is often, well how do I do that? The answer is simple, first take the time to get quiet, get comfortable feeling and hearing your inner being, and set an intention every single day to have opportunities to get to know yourself better. The intention alone sets in motion a path that is shown to you one step at a time. Be patient with yourself and know that this is not something we understand overnight. It takes time and commitment.

Stay tuned for part two to this blog post - let this one sink in, sit with in, and then check in for the sequel by signing up to this newsletter.

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